In honor of Mother’s Day I thought you might like to hear from some of the blogging moms I know. My new friend, Pat Fenner, is a terrific writer and business entrepreneur. She is also a mom with a great deal of wisdom. No matter your age or stage in life, you will benefit from her suggestions and her practical guide to blessing your children.
I know mothers. You probably do, too. I have been a mother (to 5, for 26+ years), have a mother (2, actually, a birth-mother and step-mother), have a wonderful mother-in-law (2 of those as well, actually), and have countless other wonderful mother-friends.
I know how hard we can be on each other at times, and on ourselves. I also know how much many of us try to encourage each other.
So, without trying to be hard on any of us, I’d like to offer some encouragement by sharing something important that I’ve learned over the years. And something unique that I feel I’ve done right!
Bless Your Children
Yup, that’s right, pure and simple. Sounds easy, right? Hmmm…not always so much, tho, so let’s look at it a little more closely… What exactly does that mean? I’d like to suggest 3 ways you can do this effectively.
…with your words
Many years ago my husband and I realized something that transformed the way I look at words – none of them are neutral! We either bless or curse our kids through our words. Really, if you stop and think about it, I think you’ll agree. Spend a day actually listening to how and what you say to your children. Blessing them builds them up, teaches them, encourages them, speaks life into them, lifts their countenance, enlarges their vision of the future, engages them… Curses make them feel confused, frustrated, downcast, discouraged, disappointed, alone, angry, rebellious… And how you say things is just as important!
…with your attitudes
Ah, yes, that periodic “attitude adjustment” time we require of the kiddos is equally important for us moms! I know you’re tired and frustrated and sometimes overworked and maybe lonely…but don’t take it out on the kids. There is nothing that blesses a child more than a parent who can display patience and kindness when they are not acting their best. Take time to learn what helps you maintain or regain a good attitude.
– and then do it! My recommendation is to make sure you make time each day for your Savior. There is not a better remedy or preventative for a bad attitude than time spent with Him!
…with your time
My kids have a date time with me each week. Here’s the funny thing about it: we homeschool. Which means I’m with them pretty much all the time! So you would think having a scheduled date time isn’t necessary, right? Well, not if you ask them! We usually don’t do anything special; most of the time we run errands, or go to the library or just get a drink at Sonic. But it’s the one-on-one time that makes it special. I always go “loaded” with a question to get a good discussion going. And they make sure to remind me first thing in the morning when it’s “their” day! But really, the time blesses me just as much as it blesses them…
Pass on The Blessing
A Blessing Service wraps all these 3 elements together in one special, memorable day. Not a new idea by any means, the concept of a blessing dates back to the Old Testament, and has been enjoying somewhat of a resurgence in recent years. Sadly, our culture has few significant milestones for young people, and a blessing service offers Christian families the opportunity to celebrate their children in a meaningful way as they grow into adulthood.
We have created unique Blessing Services for 4 of our 5 children, and will celebrate our last daughter’s event in 3 years. Each service has reflected the personality and style of each child. I know as parents we have made many mistakes, but my husband and I both count celebrating our children with family and friends in this way as a “parenting success”
Learn more about what a blessing service may entail here, and get a free copy of a Blessing Service, with additional resources, by contacting us via email.
As mothers, we have a sweet and special role to play in our children’s lives. The gentle nurturing we offer them as little ones develops into a solid platform from which they can launch into adulthood. And all the phases along the way provide opportunities to bless our children, and all of us are capable of doing this with love, in our own unique way.
So, this Mother’s Day, be encouraged and inspired to discover and cultivate your special way to bless the children with whom you have been blessed!
What do you do that blesses your kids? Have you thought that your words are never neutral? How can you continue to speak and offer blessing when your kids are “out of the nest?”
Pat is a Yankee city-girl who has been adopted by the sleepy, sunny south. Married for 28 years and the mother of 5, she woke up one day recently to discover she reached the stage of life where she is the “older woman” described in Titus 2:3-5. A coffee lover, the purchase of a coffee shop a few years ago was her personal foray into the small, family-owned business arena. Today, Mom’s Morning Coffee and Help 4 Your Homeschool are her outlets for packaging up and sharing the nuggets of wisdom God and life experiences have taught her.